Friends
Pairing: CLex
Rating: PG
Category: first time sort of, romance sort of
Notes: Inspired by Spiderman in an obscure way
Warnings: Spoilers for SLUMBER
Summary: Clark tells Lex... well, everything
Happy Birthday Beloved Plank!
"How long have we known each other, Clark? How long have we been friends and you've kept this from me?!" Lex demanded.
Clark winced. "Peter Parker never even told his Aunt May he was Spiderman," he replied softly.
"You are not a comic book character, Clark!" Lex snapped.
"I know that! But you see my point?" Clark sighed, "With people like me it's always the people we love who get hurt."
Lex looked up, stunned. "You love me?"
Flushing, Clark looked down and shuffled his feet, "Well, yeah, you're my best friend you know." Clark sighed, why couldn't he say what he really wanted to say?
Nodding, Lex smiled at him. "Yeah, same here." Then he frowned, "You should have told me, Clark, I'd have done anything to keep you safe, I would have protected you..."
Clark shivered, Lex's words were far too close to what he'd said in the dream for his comfort. "I don't need protecting, Lex," he sighed, "It's my friends who need protecting from me."
"Don't be ridiculous, Clark," Lex said shaking his head slightly, "You're always saving people."
Clark raised an eyebrow. "And how many times have you got into danger because of me?"
"And how many times over would I be dead now if it wasn't for you?" Lex sighed and sat down, "Look, Clark, I can't deny I'm really, really angry with you right now and I'm upset that you didn't trust me, but you're still my friend."
"I did, I do trust you, God damn it," Clark almost growled in his frustration. Why didn't Lex understand that? "I just... if anything happened to you, I..." Clark had to stop, the thought of something actually happening to Lex was too upsetting.
"Clark?" Lex looked curious.
Swallowing, Clark continued, "I couldn't deal, I can't risk you."
"Risk me?" Lex asked.
"Losing you," Clark whispered.
Lex looked completely stunned. "Clark, do you have any idea how close you came to losing me because you lied to me?"
"I had..." Clark took a deep breath, "I had a dream, you attacked me, saw what I was and you, you h-hated me." The memory of the dream nearly brought tears to his eyes, and he still couldn't admit why he was really there.
"I could never hate you, Clark," Lex said softly.
"Why not?" Clark snorted self-derisively, "I haven't been much of a friend lately."
"Still my best one though," Lex smiled ruefully, "Clark, I want to help you, I do. I want to protect you."
"But, Lex, I don't need protecting, you've seen what I can do," Clark sighed.
"You have met my father, haven't you?" Lex raised an eyebrow, "Don't doubt that he knows something, Clark. Nobody would be able to protect you from him, possibly even me, if he found out the truth, but I want to try."
"Lex, come on, it can't be that bad..." Clark hesitated, "Can it?"
Lex nodded solemnly, "Yes, it can. Let me help you, Clark. I'll do anything for my friends, you know that."
"But I," Clark sighed again, "Lex, I don't want you to be in anymore danger than you already have been for the last two years. It's bad enough I told you who... what I am, now."
"So why did you tell me?" Lex asked quietly.
"Because I, the dream, I didn't want to..."
"Lose me?" Lex asked.
Clark breathed out heavily. "Right. I already feel like I'm losing you, Lex. Since you were rescued from the island, I hardly see you." He grimaced.
"Ah Clark," Lex sighed regretfully, "I know. It's just, how can I defend myself and the people I care about from my father if I'm not on the inside? I learnt from LexCorp that I'm not ready to take him on yet."
Clark frowned, he didn't like the sound of that, "So you're playing by his rules now?"
"No!" Lex exclaimed with a frown of his own.
"Aren't you?" Clark asked quietly, "Learning his way, his game. Taking him out from the inside? Lex, that's not you."
Lex snorted, "Isn't it?"
"No, it isn't," Clark said firmly.
"Everyone else seems to think so," Lex said quietly, not quite looking at him.
"I'm not everyone else, Lex, I believe in you, I..." Clark trailed off nervously.
"What, Clark?"
"I know you, I see what's inside you and I know," Clark broke off feeling tearful again. It wasn't fair, why could no one else see that Lex tried so hard to do the right thing? It wasn't his fault he didn't always know how. That was the symptom of being his father's son, not that he was 'evil'.
"What do you know?" Lex asked softly.
"I know you're better than that, Lex," Clark whispered.
Lex let out a deep breath. "I don't understand why, Clark. Even my father doesn't believe in me, why do you?"
Clark swallowed hard, he had to do it, had to say it if only to convince Lex that he meant everything else. "Because I love you," he whispered.
"I love you too, Clark, but I still doubted you sometimes," Lex said quietly.
Clark shook his head, "I'm in love with you, Lex."
"Oh." Lex looked stunned again.
Clark got to his feet hurriedly, "I'm s-sorry, I shouldn't..."
"Stop, Clark," Lex said hurriedly, "I, forgive me for being a bit shocked but I mean... Lana?"
Clark sighed. "Did you ever stop to wonder why I keep sabotaging any chance I have with her? I did. After my dream I realised that if skinny dipping with Lana did nothing for me, while you turning on me left me feeling... devastated, then I was getting my priorities seriously skewed."
"Skinny dipping?" Lex asked, "With Lana?"
Clark smiled ruefully, "Yeah. In the dream, Lex."
Lex shook his head, "Sorry, I just, skinny dipping?"
"C'mon, Lex," Clark sighed, "It was just a dream."
Lex grinned at him, "Teasing, Clark, I'm only teasing."
Clark grimaced painfully, "Thanks, Lex, I just spilt my guts and that's all you have to say?"
"What do you want me to say?" Lex asked softly.
Clark swallowed. "That we're still friends," he whispered.
"Why wouldn't we still be friends?" Lex asked in surprise.
Blinking, Clark shrugged, "Lex, I just told you that I'm in love with you." Lex nodded and raised an eyebrow, so Clark continued, "A lot of straight guys would have a problem with that."
"What makes you think I'm straight?" Lex asked quietly.
"Uh," Clark blinked again, "Oh I don't know, girlfriends, wives..."
Lex grimaced, "Yeah, well. Dad never looked too kindly on my boyfriends."
"Boyfriends?" Clark squeaked in shock.
Lex smiled softly, "I'm bi, Clark."
"So, you don't mind if I'm gay?" Clark asked hesitantly.
"Clark," Lex sounded exasperated, "Are you being deliberately dense?"
"Um, I uh..." Clark widened his eyes imploringly, he wasn't sure what Lex meant.
"Clark," Lex leaned forward and stared at him earnestly, "Don't you get it? How many seventeen year old farm boys do you think I'd do anything for? For that matter, how many people in the entire world do you think I'd do anything for?"
Comprehension dawned and with it, hope. "Oh, I... oh."
Lex grinned, "Yeah, oh."
"Lex," Clark started hesitantly, leaning closer, "Will you, I mean, would you..."
"No."
Clark cringed, "I'm sorry." He got up to leave again.
"Shit." Lex sighed, "No, wait, Clark, I'm sorry." Lex pulled him back down, "I do... I do love you, but I don't think we should... I think we should wait."
"I've been waiting," Clark mumbled.
Lex smiled softly. "Not consciously. Clark, neither of us is ready for more. You were right, I shouldn't be living my life by my father's rules. I need time to be what you believe I can be. And you need to concentrate on school."
Clark was simply awed, he'd never imagined that level of devotion. "Wow, Lex are you serious?"
Lex looked at him sharply. "Aren't you? I'm not looking to be first time gay boy experimentation here, you know!" he snapped, misunderstanding Clark completely. Before Clark could say anything, Lex continued, "If we go beyond friendship, I want forever, Clark."
Clark just beamed at him, "So do I."
Breathing out in obvious relief, Lex nodded, "Good, okay, well..."
"You will wait, won't you?" Clark asked hesitantly.
"I've been waiting," Lex teased him with his own words, "Yes, Clark, I will wait."
"And we'll still be friends?" Clark asked, wanting to be sure.
"We'll always be friends, Clark, I promise," Lex said solemnly.
"Stuff of legend?"
Lex smiled, "Right, stuff of legend."
end
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